Mr Mulgrew’s Headache
“Good morning Mr Mulgrew, yes, I suppose I am late again, and this time I know, yes I am very late but I can explain. You see, first thing this morning I was walking across a meadow. It was so quiet and so still I could hear the grass growing treeeeeep treeeeeeeep treeeeeeep. I couldn’t help glorying in the peace and the countryside until my happiness was destroyed by the explosion of my alarm clock cloungclaung cloungclang. Then, Mr Mulgrew, I realised the sensation in my feet was not the grass of the meadow, but the cat.
I jumped out of bed and into the shower then got dressed really quickly because I thought I heard someone tapping on the window truttrattruttrattruttrat but it wasn’t anybody Mr Mulgrew, it was rain, maybe even hail. So I had to change out of my sandles and into my new leather shoes. I rushed to the bus stop but my heels were going clicityclackclicityclack on the bricks but I was in such a hurry to get to the bus stop that I didn’t see the doggy doodoo on the sidewalk. I slipped and I landed really hard on my beheuchy Mr Mulgrew and my red coat I usually wear was covered in it. It smelt rank. Really rank Mr Mulgrew. You wouldn’t want me here bringing that smell with me. So I had to dash home again and change into this clean, cream coat: but I missed the bus.
Yes, I know I am even later than usual but I even missed the bus I usually get that makes me just a few minutes late and had to get the one after that made me so very late today. You can see it wasn’t really my fault Mr Mulgrew. It was the raining and the cat and the dog. So tomorrow, if there is no raining cats and dogs, I promise I will not be nearly so late. Sorry, what was that Mr Mulgrew? Oh, yes, I might even be on time: yes, I willl close the door on my way out.”